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How do you approach the season of Lent?

Ash on your forehead, fasting and abstinence, subdued music, maybe refraining from Facebook, not eating your favorite dessert or drinking soft drinks/beer/wine/alcohol or skipping that cup of brewed coffee and not puffing one stick until Easter? These are practices that usually associated with Lent.

Yet, I’ve come to realize that these are meaningless practices for Lent……..

If they are done just to test how long you can control yourself. If the purpose is to test your endurance, your discipline, your will power. While these are not bad in themselves, these are not the reasons why we do these sacrifices.

These become meaningful when….they are done out of charity, out of love, out of compassion. They should lead to a change of mind and heart.

“To think of Lent only as a time of penance is to do it an injustice. While the traditional practice of “doing something” for Lent is praiseworthy, there is much more to this wonderful season than just additional practices of piety or acts of penance and mortification. In Lent, the Church calls us to metanoia.

As a former Greek teacher, I take delight in pointing out that the word metanoia connotes a change of mind and heart, altering one’s mind-set toward whole new ways of thinking and acting. This involves taking a look at where we are and trying to see where we ought to be. It involves testing our values and discerning how they stack up against the values that Jesus offers his followers. ” -  Most Reverend Daniel E. Pilarczyk, Lent: More Than Penance.

As Fr. Rudy Horst, SVD tells us in today’s edition of Sabbath (Go to kerygmafamily.com to subscribe and receive it daily):

“Ascetic practices are good in themselves. There is no doubt about this. But ascetic practices without practicing charity at home, in the neighborhood and among those we meet and live with every day, are useless. Better eat chocolates and smoke your cigarettes and go to a movie even during Lent, but abstain from quarreling, cheating in exams, from lying and gossiping.

Better than abstaining is doing something good. Therefore, your best “fast” would be becoming the most charitable person possible. That’s the “fasting” the disturbing prophet Isaiah teaches us today on the third day of Lent.”

Change our hearts, O God. May everything we do be acts of love for you.

For you do not desire sacrifice; a burnt offering you would not accept. My sacrifice, God, is a
broken spirit; God, do not spurn a broken, humbled heart. – Psalm 51:18-19

We are proud of our Zek.

Eversince he learned how to give alms, mostly in kind,  to the poor beggars on the streets, he has always been on the look-out for them and would eagerly ask anything from us for anything he can give out. And with an innocent understanding of what being poor is, he looks directly at the beggar’s face while handing out his alms then walks away with a joyous smile, knowing that he is able to help another person in need.

One incident though posed a huge challenge for his generosity towards the poor. After a short visit to a tree and plant nursery for Zek’s homeschool activity (see related blog link with the title “Let us Go Green” – http://zeksantos.i.ph/blogs/zeksantos/2009/12/), we passed by the small bakeshop that my wife regularly buys bread from. While inside the car and waiting for his mother, I caught a glimpse of an elderly beggar a few feet away from us. I called Zek’s attention towards the elderly while handing over a packed loaf of sweet bread from his mother’s bag.

Zek was motionless as a statue until he started to shed a tear in silent protest. I was caught off-guard with his reaction and inquired in the same instant, “Why are you crying Zek?”

“Daddy, this is my favorite bread and I am hungry now”, he said in breaking his silence about his unusual reaction to his alms-giving opportunity.

How truthful his declarations were.

After nearly two hours inside the tree nursery, he is much ready to devour any food that catches his attention. He is really hungry.

I also remember my wife telling me before that that bread is really one of his favorite bread. He can finish one loaf by himself with very little time to spare.

Right then and there, I needed to re-assure him.

“Zek, I know that you are already hungry and that this is your favorite bread, but you know mommy is out there in the bakeshop at this moment and buying another of your favorite bread for you to eat. She is also buying a good drink to go along with it for you to enjoy your snack more. Lolo over there, however is really more hungry than you and he has no mommy to buy him this bread.”

Zek hesitated and seemed to prolong his non-response. He still was visibly sad but after a longer after-thought, he went down the car and run towards Lolo and gave his favorite bread.

He came back to the car at the same time his mother arrived from the bakeshop. And as Zek was about to feel sad again about losing his favorite bread, his mother pulled out another loaf of bread – exactly the same kind which was actually under the bag which I failed to notice when I got the first one. Not only that, his mother showed him more breads bought from the bakeshop.

Zek was still sad but we knew that he understood in his young heart that we, his parents, know his needs and will provide for him no matter what.

He just needed to trust us.

A few more clock ticks and New Year is here.

While most of us are busy making personal resolutions to gain or improve our health, wealth and overall well-being, it should also make sense for us to pause and reflect what “favorite breads” of us are we willing to depart with in order to further serve the Lord in the coming year.

There are two types of “favorite breads”.

One type spoils and harms the soul. These are our favorite sins that we have become so accustomed to that it become like second skin for us. Lying, manipulation, corruption, injustice, rumor-mongering and gossiping, addiction to vices, spousal infidelities, bad temper, unforgiveness are to name a few. These things must top our agendas of things-to-avoid in the coming year.

Another type of “favorite breads” are more difficult to depart with because they bring happiness and fulfillment. Suffice to say, they are, at times, even essential. However, they can still hinder us from realizing our real calling and purpose in God’s over-all plan.

Think about these situations.
A man giving up his love of a lifetime to become a priest.
A wealthy man giving up his hard-earned belongings for the poor.
A couple leaving the comforts of simple living and braving hunger and persecution in far-flung areas to become missionaries of God’s love.

Of course, there will always be a “confused Zek” in us when these times of calling arrive into our lives.
We can be sad.
We can be anxious and wary.
We can protest in silence.
We can be fearful at what the future will hold for us and our loved ones.

However, we must take the time to listen to Him.

We can rest on His gentle voice that lovingly assures us of His guidance and providence.
In the end, we can and should trust in His promise.
Because His promise is always true.

After all, He is our Bread of Life.

Happy New Year to all.
God bless.

Parties, gifts, gadgets, crispy peso bills and new clothes…….

…have nothing to do with this.

Some of these are on your mind right now, plus the tons in your to do list,
and there are only a few days left before Christmas and 2010.

Can you feel the weight on your shoulders that even a good massage can’t relieve?

What should one do?

Here are 5 things to do before December 25 that would bring focus to the Reason of the season,
bring Soul back to your Christmas and prepare your self for His birth.

It will be the second wind you are looking for, the energy boost that you
lack and the critical break you need.

5 Things To Do Before Christmas

1. Step Back
With resolute intent, set aside a time for silence. Find a place or church
where you can really spend time with God. No need to start a conversation
in your thoughts. Let you heart speak with God’s heart.

Hear Him in silence.

Read the gospels from the four Sundays of Advent and the Christmas eve mass.
Slowly, deliberately taking time to let God’s Word sink in, cherishing the lines or
words that strike you. It would be good to write them down.

2. Look Back
Recall the past year.. Success, mistakes, people you met, rekindled. those who
helped you, even those who hurt you. Focus on your relationships with family,
friends and officemates. Have a look at how closer you are to God and how much
you depend on Him.

3. Assess Your Life
Have you improved your relationships? Which situations did you find beneficial for
others and yourself? Were there instances when your actions or inactions created
disagreements that led to broken friendships? Is being right all the time more important
than your loved ones? Have you intentionally sought to know God more, through prayer,
the bible and the sacraments?

4. Ask God
Present all these to God. Ask Him how He sees these things. Pray that He enlightens
you and speak His word to you. he will answer your prayers in ways you could never
begin to imagine. He come as Light. He is Emmanuel, God with us. Let Him guide you.

5. Resolve
More than a list of things to do or accomplish, focus on consistency than on numbers.
Put effort in constant acts of kindness and love, even when you do not feel like it.
Relationships are not about emotions. Love is about actions, of doing the good thing
for someone else, even and especially when it is uncomfortable.

Pray more often and regularly. It would help if you can set a particular time and place
where you can do this. This is how you basically know God more intimately.

6. Clean Up
I couldn’t resist inserting one more bonus step, which is actually crucial.

Ask for forgiveness from God, go to confession. Ask forgiveness from those you’ve hurt.

Clean up your stuff. You might want to go through your things and give generously to charity.
Especially those things that clutter your life, those that have not been used in a while
(and may probably be never used at all). Email me if you have stuff that would benefit
children and teens.

I’m sure doing all these things before Chrsitmas will give you a better perspective of the
Christmas Celebration. It takes off a lot of stress too =)

And On Christmas day, receive Him gladly with your heart wide open. Share the Joy
and spread the love, set the example of showing gratitude and say

“Come Lord, Jesus.”

I had the pleasure of getting acquainted with an economist (let’s call him H) who went to Cambodia a few weeks ago. He went there to take part in an Asean conference and presented some of his work. He told me two amazing stories.

After the conference, H had some time to see the sights and attend mass in the only catholic church in that area.  He arrived for mass a bit early and was invited by the the two missionary priests there for coffee. And there, the economist learned a great lesson how God works:

IT ONLY TAKES ONE.

The priest (Let’s call Him Father C) related that he grew up in a town where all the people where buddhists, except one (his uncle who became a Catholic after serving as a soldier). My friend wondered how the priest became what he
is now.

Fr. C continued (I am paraphrasing)

Back in grade school, we were learning about world religions: Islam, Buddhism, Christianity and the rest. For some reason, I was drawn to Christianity and got more curious and asked my uncle questions. The more I studied about it and the more deeper I wanted to get in. Finally, I decided that this is what I wanted to believe in, attended catechism and was baptized. Then I went on to study in the seminary and eventually wound up being where I am now.”

Now, their town is totally Catholic, except for a cousin who remains to be a Buddhist. God was really at work. We can only assume that the uncle was an intrument for the Fr. C’s conversion, and eventually the conversion of the whole town.

From “one” to “except one”.

end of first story

After the mass, Fr. C invited H to come with him. He would be celebrating mass for a village, whose houses are propped with stilts on the sea, much like the Badjaos of the Philippines.

It was a 2 hour boat ride fraught with dangers of the open sea. Fr. C celebrated mass for 25 people. Only 2 of them were baptized catholics, the rest were catechumens being prepared for baptism. There were no fireworks there but the back story is worth mentioning.

Some years back, Fr. C learned that there was one old lady who was a catholic in that fishing village. She used to live from another town but married and settled there.

When he learned about this, Fr. C asked permission from the bishop to say mass for her, even if she was alone which meant the priest had to go there – for one person. At first, the bishop was reluctant because of the dangers of travelling the sea. (By the way, the ride going to the dock from the place where the priest lived was more than an hour. The boat ride took another.) But Fr. C insisted and explained that the old lady would not have any support from the church if he didn’t go. The bishop gave his blessings and he has been saying mass there ever since. Now, more people are coming to know Jesus.

IT ONLY TAKES ONE.

End of second story; but your story continues.

Lord, please we pray for good weather and sunshine for at least two weeks. Amen.

Oratio Imperata for Deliverance from Calamities

Almighty Father, we raise our hearts to You in gratitude for the wonders of creation of which we are part, for Your providence in sustaining us in our needs, and for Your wisdom that guides the course of the universe.

We acknowledge our sins against You and the rest of creation.

We have not been good stewards of Nature.

We have confused Your command to subdue the earth.

The environment is made to suffer our wrongdoing, and now we reap the harvest of our abuse and indifference.

Global warming is upon us. Typhoons, floods, volcanic eruption, and other natural calamities occur in increasing number and intensity.

We turn to You, our loving Father, and beg forgiveness for our sins.

We ask that we, our loved ones and our hard earned possessions be spared from the threat of calamities, natural and man-made.

We beseech You to inspire us all to grow into responsible stewards of Your creation, and generous neighbors to those in need.

Amen.

When I was around 7 or 8, I remember going to mass with my family. My brother and I usually had the same shirt. After that, we would walk to Asiong’s Restaurant along F. Tanedo St., a few meters from the San Sebastian Cathedral in Tarlac and then eat “pancit” or ice cream on a cone. That was a weekly ritual of sorts that I remember with fondness. It became a family tradition. I look back and can’t help but smile.

Many families have their own unique traditions. They do not have to be grand nor should it always involve spending. Many are quite simple like early morning Sunday mass, garden breakfasts or Friday night board games.

Gina (my wife) Iani, Tesa (our daughters) and I have established some pretty unique family traditions of our own with our children. One of these is the Family Hug.

Before bedtime, we have our family prayer. Each one takes a turn leading the rest to a common prayer. We usually follow the ACTS (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving and Supplication) pattern. At the end of the prayer, leader asks Mary, the angels and our favorite saints to intercede for us.

When the prayer ends, the leader sits (or stands) in the middle, with arms relaxed on her side. She prepares for the onslaught of arms and embraces and tickles. We hug tightly for a while or until the one hugged can’t bear the tickling anymore and give up. We kiss again and the kids lie down to sleep. Iani and Tesa enjoy this very much, as do we, their parents. Sometimes, they even try to take over one another’s slot just to enjoy the affirmations and privileges that go with leading the prayer.

Many years from now, we hope that this family tradition continues, no matter how much our lives will change.

So, what family traditions do you have or are making?

Create fond memories now.

Inspired by an article from Happy Nest.

(Adapted from the talk of Edwin S during our Men’s retreat)

It is a delight to see men pray. Hulking, macho, baritone-voiced men putting their shields down to be one with the
Father. Strong, seasoned and firm leaders, hands clasped, eyes closed, kneeling.

Men have the special role, the primary task of praying for their community or family. Though every member should be praying for the group they belong to, it is the men who should be leading this charge.

It is a pity that women are more visible in churches. I enjoin you (if you are a husband) to take the lead to pray for your family alone, and with them. If you are a husband or woman, please pray for the men in your life to pray more.

Why Should Men Pray?

Prayer Discover God’s Agenda
In the movie Evan Almighty, God appears to Evan, a congressman, and asks him to be a modern-day Noah and build an ark. I think that God will not appear in that manner to tell you His plans. You need to converse with Him in quiet solitude. You need to learn to listen to His voice in your heart. It usually does not happen overnight. Constant, daily and deep prayer allows God to speak to you. It’s like “tuning in” to the frequency where God is broadcasting, and “tuning out” all the world’s distractions, and your own.

Prayer Changes Us
Don’t you feel nicer after praying? More than being nice, coming into prayer moulds us into obedience and trust in God. In prayer, God encourages us, He chastises us, He heals us. Coming into prayer makes us hold our tongue and prevent hurtful words from coming out. If you want to be a better person, have a consistent prayer time. If you already have one, continue it and you will continuously improve.

The Greatest Moments in Our Christian Life Comes Through Prayer
Most (if not all) of the highlights of Jesus’ life were while He was praying, or as a result of prayer. There was the 40 days in the desert, the agony in the garden, the descent of the Holy Spirit on Him while Jesus was praying and being baptized and many more. It is the same with us.

Look at your life. Your Spiritual “Eurekas” and breakthroughs are within the context of prayers. I remember during my high school that I finally broke my lying spree during a recollection. There were no flashes of lightning nor drum rolls. Yet, the following days, I had the grace to commit to the truth. The bonds were broken. In your case, it might be anger, impatience, lust, laziness. Or it might be something more positive like having the grace to have more focused prayer or being more positive and encouraging.

One of the biggest decisions we have ever made was when Gina retired from her job. We prayed for more than one year about it. With peace in our hearts, we went for it, despite all reservations and fears. It turned out to be one of the best choices we have made, all because of prayer.

Romy, my current pastoral leader in our community Ligaya ng Panginoon, often asks about prayer time. He tells me that from his experience (as well as others’), many men fall, backslide or are beset with worries when their prayer time is “unwell”. Have you expereinced this yourself? I did. There were occasions in the past where I would rush head long to my work and concerns – and find out that I am overwhelmed. Only when I get back to the groove of praying consistently would these concerns die out. I do not mean that they get solved at once, but the clarity of mind and perspective that comes through putting God first makes everything seem lighter and easier.

It is also during the times when I am “on a roll” with my prayer life that things are a lot smoother. Problems are still there but they do not weigh heavily on my shoulders. I’m sure you had these moments too.

So how do you put this into action, this praying business?

BY PRAYING.

Even when you do not feel like praying, pray. Commit yo yourself to pray, specially when you have no desire or think do not need to. Pray more when you are busy and when you will be busy.

Though everything here is applicable to all, I encourage men to be in the forefront of prayer.

Remember:

REAL MEN PRAY.

I took this picture and found it quite curious.

Then it dawned on me that it was asking me something.

 I believe it is asking the same thing to you.

Who or What is Number 1 in your life now?

Something to think about over the long weekend.

Please teach me, Lord …
I want to know
Exactly how to pray.
I need some words
Which ones are right?
Please tell me what to say.
I’ve bowed my head
I have knelt down,But …
should I be upright?
I’ve closed my eyes,
I’ve raised my hands,Or …
should I fold them tight?
Do I stand up?
Should I sit down?
Dear Lord … what do you like?
Are lights turned on
Or are they off?Maybe …
candle light?
Wear my glasses?
Take them off?
Be at my desk or table?
Should I whisper?
Speak out loud?
Do I quote the Bible?
What do you think about the time?
Do You prefer the dawn?
Should I pray fast,
Or keep it slow?
Better short … or long?
I’m new at this
What are the rules?
I want to do it right.
How do I know
You’ll even hear
That I am in Your sight?
And while I sat there quietly,
Waiting for some sign,
I heard a gentle voice say,

“Oh, dearest child of mine …
Do you think I really care
About the time of day,
Or whether you are standing up,
Or kneeling when you pray?”
“I don’t care about your posture,
Or about the place you choose;
Just open up your soul to me,
I have no other rules.
Tell me what is in your heart,
And tell me what you seek;
Tell me of your sorrows,
And of those things that made you weak.”
“Speak to me in private
About what concerns you most;
I know about your good deeds …
You have no need to boast.
My child, you don’t need lessons,
Just talk to me each day;
Tell me anything you want, dear child,
Anyone can pray.”